It’s the most patriotic time of year, the one between Memorial Day and Labor Day. We have plenty of occasions and just plain old Tuesdays to don symbols of Old Glory right on our bodies for all to see.
This post was originally going to be about making an overly patriotic T-shirt for my husband. But then I thought, let’s get a little more American here. Let’s get super red, white and blue. Let’s use denim, one of America’s premier fabrics, and really go to town on it.
Let’s chop up a pair of jeans from Goodwill and get so full of pride for this country that fireworks start to shoot out of our fingertips.
And that’s how I ended up finding out that fabric spray paint is now a thing. Move aside, puff paint from the 90s! Michael’s Crafts has individual bottles for $6, or a whole set of Americana for $20 that includes silver glitter, the most patriotic color of them all. While at the craft store you’ll also want to pick up some painter’s tape and a star-shaped stencil.
Your jeans or shorts, if they already came that way, should be ones that fit nicely because people are going to be looking at your display of patriotism. You want to feel like you look good enough to represent your country here. For those of us who are starting with jeans, put them on. Take a Sharpie to mark a few inches below where you want them to hit. Remove them and chop, taking care to make the legs even.
Take the remaining pants-now-shorts and get to work taping off your designs, as well as laying down plenty of newspaper or cardboard to catch the random paint drippings you’re guaranteed to have. Spray as directed on the bottle, which is to say, light, even coats with plenty of time in between sprays. For the stripes, use one color at a time, and let the first color dry 100%, overnight is best, before taping over it to spray on the other color.
Once the painting step is complete, you need to have a moment with yourself to decide your fashion direction. Do you want to be carefree and rough up the leg openings a la Daisy Duke, or do you want to go kind of classy and roll them up crisply?
It’s up to each American to make that choice for themselves.